Emotional Management Order

Lately, I had been having crisis…

The most horrible one is from deep inside. The one that cannot be seen.

The most surface crisis is the one that made me more creative on food.

It had been one week, I have to live with that RM10. Waiting for my monthly salary. RM10. I need it for my food and car’s food. So I decide, that I cannot live without my car. So I decide to save it for the petrol. But, something happens without prior notice. Some bloody nails poked into the tire. RM8 files away just like a dove sees blue blue sky. And my bloody pride just cannot stand the feeling of telling other, I am poor, can I borrow some money. I just cant do that. Even my car is more and more indicating Empty…. I think so hard. Where had I kept all my money. Maybe I have hide some under my pillow…. Just in time. My salary entered with a whatsapp notice. It was close… But because of this, I had a chance to combine some delicious food…

Emotional Management Order (EMO)…

It had been red lights throughout this examination week. In a week, I need 2 times for my individual time. It is not normal at all! I had been giving EMO to myself! An order to manage my own emotions!

I know it is not good to blame others. But he is the source. I knew at least he is the coal for my fire. No matter what we breed, we still are made of greed. There’s a beast inside wanted so much from him. There, I am finding source to extinguish this fire. Here the coal are too strong, to flammable.

But it had been sometime, I kept feeding fish in the galaxy. As if, feeding the fish had become the only thing I can do there.